• me during shower time: What is my mission here on earth? What would have happened if Hitler got killed before he started the war? What if is there's a bigger force controlling us right now?
  • me almost falling asleep: I think I've solved the mystery of Atlantis and the cure for cancer and starving in Africa and the problems for all bad things in the universe
  • me during the day: how do I spell house?

(Source: recordas)

i cybered on omegle today

  • You: hi
  • Stranger: hey
  • You: wanna cyber
  • Stranger: Depends are you a girl? ;)
  • You: ya
  • Stranger: And okay then, you start?
  • You: i come into ur bedroom
  • You: and ur sleeping
  • You: and i crawl under your blanket
  • Stranger: I'm still asleep
  • You: u feel me pulling down ur pants
  • You: and u wake up and smile
  • Stranger: I kiss you gently, still sleepy
  • You: then i smile and open the scissors around your dick and snap them closed
  • You: cutting off your penis
  • Stranger: wait
  • You: THATS WHAT YOU GET FOR CHEATING ON ME
  • Stranger: Then what...?
  • You: I HATE YOU
  • Stranger: I didn't cheat
  • You: you bleed to death in your bed
  • Stranger: i didn't cheat on you. lets restart ok
  • You: nobody ever knows what happened
  • You: i flee to mexico with your Mercedes
  • You: the end
  • Stranger: I have a mercedes?
  • You: not anymore faggot
  • Your conversation partner has disconnected.

(Source: itsburied)

(Source: teen-espirit)